Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Recap: Eye Spy

The episode starts in Stockholm, Sweden.  Several men carrying briefcases handcuffed to their hands and wearing red masks, tweed caps and business suits enter a subway station.  A woman notices them and follows them onto a train.   While the train is in a tunnel, she smashes a panel that disables the lights in the train.  When the train reaches its next stop, people exit the car in a panic.   All of the red masked men are dead.  One man’s hand has been cut off and his briefcase is missing.

The woman is seen opening the briefcase at another subway stop.  It contains a smaller case full of diamonds which the woman places in her bag. 

Coulson breaks down what happen in the tease.  One of the largest gem brokers in the world hired 55 men, dressed them in identical outfits, gave each a randomly assigned briefcase, and sent them along randomly assigned routes in Stockholm.  The elaborate method of transport was chosen because there have been a number of recent ‘impossible’ diamond heists.  Coulson notes that witnesses described an athletic black woman as the sole attacker.  Witnesses also noted that she closed her eyes during the attack, something that is ‘either very important or very random’.

Coulson wants Skye to break down some theories on how someone could have ‘hacked’ the system.  Skye posits superpowers are involved, (e.g., ESP, Precognition, etc.), but Agent May says science has shown no proof that these powers exist.

Umm… didn’t S.H.I.E.L.D. agent Clint Barton (a.k.a. Hawkeye) spend nearly the entire Avengers movie mind controlled by an Asgardian god?  I wouldn’t be so quick to dismiss the concept that someone might have a little ESP.

In any case, Coulson notes that they only have a description of the perpetrator because the CC-TV network was taken offline during the attack.  Skye then points out that they should check social media (specifically Instagram).  Coulson makes some crack about how this part of the job gets easier every year, but becomes serious when he finds his ‘athletic black woman’ in the photos.  Her name is  Akela Amador—and he trained her.

Akela Amador was a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent who went missing during a mission about ten years ago.  She was presumed dead, but Coulson wasn’t convinced.  May realizes that Coulson suspected she was behind this robbery, which is why he took this case to begin with.  Being the no nonsense agent she is, May suggests inform S.H.I.E.L.D. HQ that Amador is alive so they can track her down.  Coulson wants to keep internal to their group for the moment.  It is obvious this mission is very personal for him.

Amador is in her hotel room waiting for her buyer.  After dramatically closing her eyes, she asks him why he has one guy in the stairwell and one in the room next door.  The buyer is shaken, but she seems to accept it when he says that they are for his protection when he leaves.  Amador gives him the diamonds in exchange for a blank keycard.  He assures her that it will ‘access all the levels as promised’.

In Zloda, Belarus the entire team (minus Melinda May) is driving down the road in a van, or the ‘short bus’ as May calls it.  Skye and Fitz-Simmons setup a command center in the van, where they can use the Internet and Science! to track down Amador, while Coulson and Ward head out to do things the old-fashioned way.  Skye once again posits her ESP theory, which Simmons immediately scoffs at.

Seriously, has no one here heard of the Avengers?  That can’t be it because in the previous three episodes they wouldn’t shut up about them.

Arriving at a hotel, Ward and Coulson show the woman at the front desk a picture of Amador.  She recognizes it and calls Amador ‘my angel’, telling the agents that Amador sees things and warned her about her cancer in time for treatment.  When Coulson says that they need to speak with her, the woman at the desk notes that ‘with her gift’ that Amador probably knows they are coming.

Back at the ‘short bus’ they lock onto some kind of encrypted video feed.  After clearing it up a bit, they realize that it is someone watching them just in time for that someone to ram the van with a truck.  Skye is able to see Amador is driving the truck just before the van rolls over.

Luckily for the team, this was the extent of her evil plan.  Apparently, she just wanted to delay them and give herself plenty of time to escape.  Once back on the bus, they are able to tap into the transmission again.  They soon realize the camera is Amador’s right eye, which apparently has been replaced by a camera ‘ten years’ more advanced then anything S.H.I.E.L.D. has.  When she closes her eyes, the transmission changes to a sort of x-ray mode. 

S.H.I.E.L.D. also finds out that she is being controlled by someone else.  The watch Amador ask if she can sleep by writing on a piece of paper.  The response to ‘stand by’ is visible as writing superimposed on the screen.

Melinda May thinks it is past time to bring the rest of S.H.I.E.L.D. in, but Coulson shuts her down again.  Instead, he suggests the team take turns watching the video feed until they see something that reveals her location.

Much later, Coulson comes out to find the video feed unattended even though it was May’s turn to watch.  Playing it back, he sees that Amador received an eye message concerning the Todorov building as well as a receipt for her room services that shows which hotel she is in.  It doesn’t take Coulson long to figure out that May has gone after Amador herself.

May confronts Amador.  Amador asks if Coulson sent her, but May tells her that while Coulson feels sorry for Amador, she does not.  She will take Amador back to S.H.I.E.L.D. where she will get a fair trial.  Amador scoffs at this and tells May that there is a failsafe device in her head that will kill her if she does not comply—only one of them will be making it out of the room alive.

The two women fight, and Agent May has the upper hand until Amador knocks out the light.  May can’t see, but Amador’s super-vision allows her to pick up a discarded gun and point it at Agent May.  Before she can pull the trigger, Coulson kicks down the door and shoots her with an improved version of ‘night-night’ gun from the pilot.

Amador wakes up in the bus.  She is surprised to be alive, but Coulson explains that they have hijacked the feed.  Agent Ward is wearing a pair of glasses that are transmitting to her handler and is performing her mission to defray suspicion that anything has gone wrong.  Coulson grills her for information, but she has very little.  She knows her handler is English because he uses terms like ‘boot’ and ‘lift’.  Because he is a bad typist, Coulson determines he must be heavy set with pudgy fingers.

I don’t know how to break this to Coulson, but in my experience how well you type has very little to do with how much you weigh.

Since they have very little time, Coulson recruits Fitz-Simmons to remove her eye.  I kind of wish one of them had exclaimed, “Dammit Coulson, I’m a scientist not a doctor!”  Instead, after some weak protests the two of them nervously begin surgery.

Coulson and May believe they can track the transmission back to the ‘heavyset Englishman’.  May sensibly suggests she take him down while Coulson supervises the operation but not surprisingly Coulson insists that this one is his.

Meanwhile, Agent Ward is making his way through the Todorov building when he hits his first snag—the handler asks him to seduce the a security guard.  Ward suggests that he just take the guy out, but Skye tells him he can’t because he might be needed for the next stage of the mission.  Since Skye determines by the guard’s slovenly appearance that he is probably not gay, she suggests Ward’s only hope is to bromance him by talking sports and being friendly.

This is not Ward’s strong point and it shows.  Failing to bromance the guard he knocks him unconscious and walks into the next room.  This room has chalkboards full of equations and two men in front of typewriters.  Unsure what to do he walks around until he sees a specific set of equations on the board and his handler sends him a message saying “Mission Complete. Good Luck.” 

Ward realizes what this means when he walks outside and sees that the guard apparently had to periodically enter a password on his computer or else an alarm would go off.  Oops.  Agent Ward ‘James Bonds’ his way out of the building, but not before seeing himself in a mirror.  The handler activates the failsafe in Amador’s eye, but Fitz-Simmons manage to remove it just in time.

Coulson manages to track down the handler in a nearby square by noticing his nervous demeanor.  Coulson stops him and shows him his S.H.I.E.L.D. badge, but it turns out the handler is also under control of someone as his own eye’s failsafe goes off, killing him instantly.

Amador is taken into S.H.I.E.L.D. custody, where Coulson assures her she will get a fair trial.  Agent May speaks with her briefly and Amador asks “what happen to him?”  May explains that he has lightened up a bit after his injury in the battle of New York, but that is not what Amador means.  Instead, she more insistently asks, “what did they DO to him?”

Obviously, when Amador still had her bionic eye she saw something odd about Coulson.

Stray Thoughts

The bionic eye in this episode seemed to be ‘inspired’ by the Eye-5 contact lenses from Torchwood.  They both transmit visual information but not sound and they both allow another person to communicate with the ‘wearer’ by typing information into his or her field of vision.

When I first saw the red masks in the trailer last week I assumed that we were finally going to get our Rising Tide story and that the red masks were stand-ins for the Guy Fawkes masks worn by some members of Anonymous.  The real reason, they were disguises for men transporting diamonds, makes much less sense.

Transporting diamonds via men wearing red masks seems like a really bad idea.  Wouldn’t they attract way too much attention?  Rather than trying to disguise the men, wouldn’t a double-blind situation work here?  If neither the men or the people giving them the briefcases knew which one had the diamonds in it, it wouldn’t really matter if you could tell the men apart.

Everyone dismissing Skye’s ESP suggestion just seemed odd.  Throughout the series it has been noted that the world has gotten ‘weirder’ and it is the mandate of this team to investigate the ‘weird’.  I understand exhausting normal explanations first, but discounting the possibility of superpowers just seems idiotic.

The show really seems to be struggling with the massive resources S.H.I.E.L.D. brings to the table.  This is the second episode in a row where Agent May suggests they take advantage of the resources S.H.I.E.L.D. can bring to bear only to be shot down by Coulson.  I hope this doesn’t become her ‘thing’.

Agent Ward killed some people on his way out of the Todorov building, right?  As far as I know it was never established that these were bad guys.  In any case, the security guards seemed like average Joes doing their jobs, not nefarious killers.

I really, really hope that when the big bad is revealed that it is not a group made up specifically for the TV show.  A resurgent Hydra or AIM would be great, but I would settle for Agence Byzantine, Black Spectre or the Secret Empire.

In Conclusion

The drama was a bit improved this outing and everyone got something to do.

Rating: 4 out of 5

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Recap: The Asset

The episode begins with a ordinary looking semi-truck travelling down the highway.  There are two standard S.H.I.E.L.D. black SUVs behind it.  One of them passes and the driver waves to the agent as she passes.  Suddenly, the SUV in front of the semi is tossed into the air like a toy.  This causes the trucker to contact S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters on his CB (apparently he is a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent as well). Shortly afterwards the other SUV is tossed into the air followed by the semi-truck itself.

After it crashes, several men in camouflage carrying guns approach the back of the truck.  Using a excavator on the side of the road, the men tear through the trailer revealing a secret compartment with the S.H.I.E.L.D. logo on it.  The men cut through the compartment to reveal a somewhat bored man sitting in a chair.  Upon seeing the men breaking in, he adjusts his glasses and asks "Are we there yet?" in a somewhat annoyed tone.

Back at the Mobile Command (a.k.a. the bus) Agent Ward is supervising Skye in some basic strength training.  Skye is pretty annoyed at all this physical activity, but Ward insists that if she wants to be a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent, she will have a defining moment where she will either commit fully to this training or run.  Skye asks Ward what his "defining moment" was, snidely commenting that if he doesn't tell her she will simply have Coulson pump him up with some truth serum again.  Ward shuts her down by telling her that S.H.I.E.L.D. doesn't have any truth serum-- apparently the scene from the pilot that convinced her to join was just an act.

The training is interrupted by Agent Coulson announcing that a convoy carrying a priority red asset was just attacked.  Coulson reveals that the priority red asset was a man named Dr.Franklin Hall.  Fitz-Simmons express concern as they know Dr. Hall personally.  Coulson then reveals the most unusual aspect of the attack-- the attackers were invisible!

At the scene of the attack, Simmons detects some unusual electro-static activity.  Her scanner accidently activates something which causes the gravel on the side of the road to rise into the air and begin swirling around in a dangerous fashion.  Fitz manages to stop deactivate the effect and the gravel drops down to the ground, leaving just a small glowing sphere that Coulson grabs.

Back on the bus, Coulson expresses concern that in order for the attackers to have known the route the convoy was taking that they either have a mole inside of S.H.I.E.L.D. or they have some way to monitor their communications.  Skye suggests she can analyze the treads they found at the scene, but Ward has already done that.  She then attempts to question Coulson about Ward's earlier comment that S.H.I.E.L.D. does not have a truth serum, but is cut off by Agent May handing her a list of all S.H.I.E.L.D. communications that have been made since the decision to transfer Dr. Hall was made.

Coulson and Ward chase down the man who sold the excavator.  Apparently the man was paid in gold.  Fitz-Simmons track the gold back to Dacey mine in Tanzania, which is owned by Quinn Worldwide. 

In Malta, Ian Quinn pays a visit to Franklin Hall.  The two have a history and Franklin Hall claims that Quinn has made a lot of money stealing his ideas.  He also notes that S.H.I.E.L.D. won't be able to come after him in Malta as they hate outside interference in their affairs.  Quinn shows Hall a sphere identical to the one that Coulson found earlier.  Hall is stunned as he recognizes it as using Gravitonium, a theoretical element which warps local gravity fields when excited by an electrical charge.  A one inch sphere was able to easily toss a semi-truck in the air.  Quinn then shows Hall a massive version of the same device.

Back on the bus, the team tries to figure out a way to liberate Dr. Hall without violating international law.  The compound is too secure for a frontal assault by anything less than a full S.H.I.E.L.D. strike force.  They could get in if they had a man on the inside (or perhaps a brave monkey), but they don't have time to organize that kind of covert operation.  Skye offers to go in.  Ward objects, but Coulson decides it makes sense.  After all, Skye is not a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent and her hacking skills allow her to finagle an invite to the shareholder meeting that is going on.

Fitz-Simmons provide Skye with a compact that will connect wirelessly to the compounds network when placed close enough to a computer.  This will allow Fitz-Simmons to deactivate the force field surrounding the place so a two man extraction team can enter to retrieve Skye and Hall.  Agent May assumes she will be on the team and protests that she has already seen more action than she bargained for, but Coulson surprises her by stating that the two man team will consist of Ward and him.  May tells Coulson that specialist work is different from field work, but Coulson cuts her off saying that he saw plenty of action with the Avengers.  Of course this prompts May to point out that he died in action with the Avengers.

Skye does pretty well at infiltrating the party.  Quinn, who is invited her because she is a member of the Rising Tide, even makes her a job offer.  He then gives a speech to his shareholders that seems almost custom tailored to make Skye question her loyalties.  Regardless, Skye goes looking in the house for a vulnerable computer-- until she gets caught by Quinn.  He is about to call security when she writes him a note warning him that S.H.I.E.L.D. is listening.

Skye disposes of her earpiece in a champagne flute and explains to Quinn that she was picked up in LA and has been gathering Intel on S.H.I.E.L.D. ever since.  It soon becomes obvious that Skye is just playing for time until she can get the magic computer hacking compact to work though.

Which it does just in the nick of time as Coulson and Ward have found themselves trapped between a force field and a gunfight.  Back at base Fitz-Simmons deactivate the force field just long enough for the two agents to get into the compound.  Ward goes to rescue Skye while Coulson goes to find Dr. Hall.

Skye uses the skills Ward taught her to avoid capture just long enough for Ward to save the day.  Coulson has a harder time of it though as he finds out that Dr. Hall doesn't intend escape.  Instead it is revealed that he orchestrated his own capture so he would have a chance to destroy the Gravitonium.  Unfortunately, doing this will destroy the entire island nation of Malta. 

Dr. Hall begins to overload the device, which causes local gravity to go haywire.  When it becomes obvious to Coulson that he cannot reason with Hall, he shoots the window, which is now the floor that they are standing on, and Dr. Hall falls into the Gravitonium sphere.  Somehow this stabilizes the reaction.

Cutting ahead a couple of days, Coulson has S.H.I.E.L.D. place the Gravitonium sphere in "Deep Freeze" and specifically asks that it not be shot into space.  On a personal level, Skye begins to take her field training more seriously, May decides that she would rather be in the field than sit on the sidelines while others take risks, and Coulson expresses concern over how his muscle memory seems a bit on the rusty side.

In the ending tag, the viewers get to see a shape in the form of a human hand attempt to escape the sphere but get sucked back in.

Stray Thoughts

Gravitonium is Atomic Number 123 and Atomic Mass 308.  Atomic Number 123 is currently an empty spot on the Periodic Table in between Unbibium (122) and Unbiquadium (124).

Comic book fans will recognize Dr. Franklin Hall as the supervillain Graviton.  While he is immensely powerful, Graviton has never really been an A-List villain like Magneto or Doctor Doom.  Nevertheless, he has always had a special place in my heart as my first exposure too him was as the surprise big bad at the end of the West Coast Avengers limited series.  I am happy to see him get some live action exposure.

This episode seems to retcon the truth serum scene from the pilot.  Since I was not a big fan of that scene I can’t really complain.

Apparently Coulson only owns suits.

Man does Malta get a bad rap in this episode.  What the heck has S.H.I.E.L.D. been up to that it is legal to shoot them on sight there?  Of course, after the way they treated the Peruvian government last episode, maybe this is typical of S.H.I.E.L.D. relations.

Didn’t S.H.I.E.L.D. just cause a major international incident?  They specifically talked about how attacking during the shareholder meeting would cause international outrage, but that is exactly what they did!  Skye had mentioned that Ian Quinn had a reputation as a huge philanthropist.  He had gathered his shareholders and just announced a major scientific breakthrough.  Then S.H.I.E.L.D. attacks, destroys his lab and steals his research.  I wonder if other countries will adopt the “shoot S.H.I.E.L.D. agents on sight” policy after this.

It made me laugh that three S.H.I.E.L.D. agents on a hostile island absconded with the Gravitonium during a convenient cut scene.  It reminds me of how in King Kong they never made any attempt to explain how they managed to transport a thirty foot tall ape from Skull Island to New York on a boat that was not much larger than he was.

I wish that a better reason was given for not using the Slingshot to shoot the Gravitonium into the sun than “Coulson said so”.  After all, this stuff seems ten times more dangerous than the super laser from last episode.  A single line of dialogue saying “With the gravity fluctuations this produces it would never make it to the sun” or “We don’t know how the sun’s intense gravitational field would interact with this substance” would work.  As it stands, the real reason seems to be “We need to be able to bring back Graviton later”.

I get that Agent May was frustrated sitting on the sidelines, but it seemed like she decided to become a field agent again way too easily.  I have to assume something major caused her to quit, so I would expect it would take something equally major to bring her back.  All and all this episode seemed way too pedestrian to spark that kind of change.

In Conclusion

This episode moved at a faster pace than the previous episodes and the threat of the Gravitonium seemed much more worthy of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s time than the super laser from last episode.  On the downside the ending seemed rushed and I never quite bought the “will Skye betray them” plot line despite the fact that Skye will obviously betray them at some point (probably during sweeps).

Rating: 3 out of 5 stars (I feel like a broken record).

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Recap: 0-8-4

The episode literally begins with a bang—as the side of the S.H.I.E.L.D. Aerial Mobile Command Center (a.k.a. the bus) explodes.  A man is sucked out of the plane and inside Agent Coulson is shown holding on for for dear life.

The episode then flashes back to nineteen hours earlier.  Coulson has dropped the (figurative) bomb that he is bringing on Skye as a consultant.  Ward and May are very unhappy with this decision.  Ward is mostly concerned that as a member of the Rising Tide she is a security risk while May is unhappy that they are adding another non-combatant into the mix.  Fitz-Simmons try their best to make her feel welcome, but Skye is obviously a bit overwhelmed.  She makes an attempt to mend fences with Ward but he cuts her off by insisting she read the safety instructions for the plane.

The 0-8-4, an object of unknown origin, was reported in Peru so that is where the team is going.  Coulson mentions that the last 0-8-4 he was asked to investigate, Thor’s Hammer, was pretty interesting.

Once in Peru, the team travels to an Incan archeological dig site.  The 0-8-4 is partially buried in the wall and Fitz-Simmons note that it seems to be a combination of alien technology and German engineering.  Skye feels a bit useless because there is nothing on the Internet about it and she can’t keep up with Fitz-Simmons technobabble.

Ward and May secure the perimeter.  Ward calls May by her nickname, “The Cavalry”, which she asks him never to call her.  They are then attacked by men in army uniforms.  May and Ward handle the first wave without much effort, but as reinforcements show up they find themselves in a standoff.

When Coulson comes out to see what is going on, he is surprised that the leader of the opposing group is someone he recognizes.  Her name is Comandante Camilla Reyes and the two of them have a history together.  Both sides agree to stand down.

Comandante Reyes wants to have a conversation about how to proceed concerning the unknown object found on Peruvian soil, but Coulson shuts her down by saying S.H.I.E.L.D. has authority in this matter.  Reyes seems a bit perturbed by this but lets the matter drop for the moment.

Ward is obviously concerned that the Peruvian National Police are now involved and attempts to get Fitz-Simmons to speed things up.  His concerns turn out to be justified when a group of anti-mining rebels show up and attack.  Over Fitz-Simmons protests Ward yanks the 0-8-4 out of the wall and places it in Fitz’s backpack. 

Ward buys them some time to escape by using some sort of S.H.I.E.L.D super weapon that emits a concussive blast that knocks down most of the rebels.  The S.H.I.E.L.D. agents and the Peruvian National Police both head towards the bus while having a running firefight with the rebels.  During the firefight Fitz-Simmons and Skye’s inexperience with combat becomes obvious, something Comandante Reyes notices with some interest.

Both the Peruvian National Police and S.H.I.E.L.D. manage to get onboard the bus.  May gets them in the safely in the air, but Fitz-Simmons express concern at how dangerous the 0-8-4 is. Fitz tells them that it is Tesseract powered Hydra technology and worse that it is not entirely stable.

With the immediate threat over, the tension that has been building between the various S.H.I.E.L.D. members finally boils over.  Fitz is pissed that Ward didn’t heed his warnings that 0-8-4 was too dangerous to move while Ward complains that Fitz doesn’t speak in plain English.  Simmons seems much more freaked out that she was in a firefight than she wants to let on, while Skye is freaked out to find out that this is only the second mission that this supposedly elite team has been on together.  Coulson reminds them they are professionals and tells them in no uncertain terms to “work it out”.

The various team members go their separate ways.  Fitz-Simmons continue to work on the 0-8-4 and determine it is an incredibly powerful laser.  Fitz notes that they were lucky they didn’t set it off when they were examining it with their drones.  Skye attempts some fence-mending with Ward by bringing him a bottle of liquor and trying to explain that her  worldview to him.  To sum it up, what Skye loves about the Internet (and the Rising Tide) is that it brings people together to solve problems.  No one has 100% of the solution, but if 100 people have 1% then you have something.  Ward is far from a convert as he was trained to be “the whole solution”, but actually seems to be listening rather than just showing her his “hate-face”.

Coulson takes Reyes to his quarters to look at his collectables.  She makes a play to seduce him, but since showing a woman your collectables never works as a prelude to a seduction Coulson realizes something is up.  Back at the bar, Ward realizes the same thing when he notices that none of the Peruvian National Police are touching their drinks.

Despite some slick moves from Ward, the Peruvian National Police manage to gas Agent May and get the drop on both Fitz-Simmons and Skye.  Coulson is forced to surrender to Reyes, who admits that she decided to betray them as soon as she saw how green Coulson’s team is.

Reyes has the majority of the team tied up down in the hanger bay while keeping Coulson close so that he can confirm the route change with S.H.I.E.L.D. ground control and keep them from being shot out of the sky.  If he refuses to comply, she will simply open the hanger bay and his team will be blown out if the plane.

In the hanger bay, the group tries to formulate an escape attempt.  When Fitz-Simmons find out that May is “The Cavalry” they figure she will be able to get them out.  She counters that they are the geniuses, but they are having difficulty dealing with the pressure.  Ward however tells them that they don’t need to come up with the entire solution, that they all can just come up with part of it.  This hearkens back to his earlier discussion with Skye.

The plan they come up with involves Agent May disabling their guard, then the group breaking into Fitz-Simmons lab.  Fitz than pilots one of his drones (Sneezy) through the plane until he gets it near the 0-8-4.  It sends out an electromagnetic probe that activates the laser and blows a hole in the side of the plane (and bringing us to the scene from the teaser).  The sudden depressurization causes the safety protocols to unlock the doors and allows the agents access to the rest of the plane.

Agent May takes back control of the cockpit while Agent Ward tries to neutralize the remaining members of the Peruvian National Police.  Everyone else works on retrieving the 0-8-4.  Seeing one of the safety instructions from earlier blow past her, Skye realizes she can plug the hole in the side of the aircraft with one of the inflatable rafts stowed onboard.

The bus safely arrives at “the Slingshot”, where dangerous objects like the 0-8-4 can be shot into the sun.  The group, which has finally gelled, gathers together to drink some beers and watch the rocket launch.  No one notices as Skye gets a message on her phone from the Rising Tide asking for an update on her status.  She simply types, “I’M IN.” and puts the phone away.

Normally, this would be where the episode ends, but there is a special scene with Samuel Jackson as Nick Fury berating Coulson for blowing a hole in the bus after only six days.  He demands that Coulson rebuild it just the way he found it, which causes Coulson to place a call to “cancel the fish tank”.

Stray Thoughts

This episode really had me wondering about S.H.I.E.L.D.’s jurisdiction.  The name “Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division” implies a U.S. organization.  Also, Reyes makes the comment “You stay inside of your borders and I will stay inside of mine” to Coulson.  I know in the comics S.H.I.E.L.D. has tended to bounce between being an international UN run organization and a U.S. organization, but this episode did little to clear things up.

For that matter, the 0-8-4 itself was a bit of a disappointment.  I didn’t see how it was such a huge threat that it needed to be shot into the sun.  In the end it was just a big laser powered by Tesseract technology. 

This episode also made S.H.I.E.L.D. seem really hypocritical. One of the subplots of The Avengers was that S.H.I.E.L.D. had a stockpile of this kind of weaponry.  Agent Ward even uses a S.H.I.E.L.D. super-weapon to take out the rebels in this very episode.  I guess it is only wrong for other people to use the alien technology they find.

Another question is why did the ministry call S.H.I.E.L.D. in the first place if they were just going to send their own people in to secure it?  Especially since Reyes states that it wasn’t an unknown object after all, but a super-weapon that had been commissioned by the government of Peru after the fall of Hydra and had simply been lost.  I guess this was just a case of the right-hand of the Peruvian government not knowing what the left-hand was doing?

On an entirely different subject, I was really bugged by the raft being able to plug a hole in the side of the plane.  I know it is silly to nitpick something like this in a TV show with alien super-weapons and flying cars, but it really took me out of the show.

In Conclusion

This episode wasn’t bad, but failed to improve on the pilot in any substantial way.

Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Recap: Pilot

The last time I tried my hand at recapping a TV Show on this blog it was another Joss Whedon show: Dollhouse.  Shortly after deciding to recap the show it was cancelled.  Here is hoping that history does not repeat itself.

Please note that the recap below is pretty in depth.  It contains spoilers, so if you haven’t seen the pilot episode of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. yet and don’t want to be spoiled, don’t read any further.

The episode starts with a woman stating that the “Secret is out” and that the world is now aware that “Heroes and Monsters” are among us.  Quick flashes of Iron Man’s arc reactor, Thor’s Hammer, Captain America’s Shield, Chitauri drones and the Incredible Hulk are shown.

The scene then settles on a street in East Los Angeles where a young boy looks through a shop window at Marvel Comics action figures while his father pays for a hot dog.  His father is played by J. August Richards, the first Whedon alumni to appear in this series.

At this point the top level of the building down the street explodes!

The father springs into action noting that people could be hurt.  After making his way around the corner he begins climbing up the wall by punching his own hand-holds into the brick wall.  At street level, various people are taking pictures of the fire with their camera phones and are stunned when a mysterious hooded superhuman leaps from the top floor carrying a prone woman.  Only one of the gawkers gets a clear shot of his face, a young woman who is apparently the same young woman doing the voice over in the beginning.

The scene then cuts to Paris, where we are introduced to Agent Ward.  As he speeds through the city streets he is is told to abort his mission because “The Rising Tide” has become aware of the target and has posted its location online.  Agent Ward decides to go after the target anyway and “James Bonds” his way through a building using disguises, gadgets and fisticuffs to successfully escape with a small velvet pouch containing a Chitauri Neural Link.

We then cut to Ward back at base being asked by Maria Hill what S.H.I.E.L.D. stands for.  He answers “Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division”, conveniently reminding the casual viewer of the meaning of the acronym.  Ward is a bit annoyed at being pulled out of Paris, but it is soon revealed that he is being recruited for a special team by Agent Coulson who dramatically reveals himself to be alive.

Coulson gives a rather mundane explanation for his resurrection, stating that he was he was merely badly injured and that Director Fury used his supposed death to motivate the Avengers.  Since then he has been recuperating in Tahiti until recent events, namely the appearance of this new hooded superhuman, necessitated his return.

Of course, as this is a Joss Whedon show things can’t be that simple.  After Coulson leaves with Ward, Agent Hill has an ominous conversation Dr. Streiten, played by Whedon alumni Ron Glass, about how Coulson can never know what really happen.

Back in LA, our favorite hooded superhuman is sitting in a diner looking at the through the classifieds for a job.  He is joined by the woman from the crowd who recognized him.  She introduces herself as Skye and reveals that she knows he has super powers.  She warns him that S.H.I.E.L.D. is coming for him and that he should get out ahead of this by becoming a “real superhero”.   He seems disinterested, but she tells him how to locate her “mobile office” (i.e., van) before he leaves.  She also manages to steal his driver’s license and finds out his real name is Mike Peterson.

Coulson then recruits his next team member, Agent Melinda May.  She was a field agent back in the day, but has retired to a desk job and seems to like it that way.  Coulson ultimately manages to sway her by promising her that there will be no red tape and that she will only be “driving the bus”.

The bus is revealed to be a massive jet/mobile headquarters.  Already onboard are “Fitz-Simmons”.  Agent Fitz (the man) is revealed to be an engineer while Agent Simmons (the woman) is biochemistry expert.  The two agents have obviously worked together for a long time as they talk rapidly to each other and finish each others sentences, hence everyone referring to them as Fitz-Simmons.

When Agent Ward first arrives onsite, Agent Fitz and Agent Simmons arguing about the viability of a non-lethal “night night” gun that shoots paralyzing pellets-- I wonder if that will come up later?

Speaking of things that will come up later, Coulson arrives onsite in “Lola”, his custom red 1962 Chevy Corvette.  With the gang all here, the new S.H.I.E.L.D. team travels to Los Angeles where it takes a comically short amount of time for them to locate Rising Tide member Skye and black bag her.

Coulson and Ward interrogate Skye back at the mobile command.  She refuses to cooperate, telling them that she won’t let them cover up Centipede the way they have covered up things like New Mexico (the Hulk) and Project Pegasus.  Skye is surprised when she realizes Ward and Coulson have no idea what Centipede is.

Meanwhile, Mike Peterson argues with a mysterious doctor over the phone that maybe he should go public.  While he is talking, it is revealed that there is a metal object that looks like a centipede fused to his arm.  He is obviously hoping  to parlay his superpowers to a profit as he is looking at an eviction notice while talking, but the doctor on the other end of the line shuts him down by reminding him of the papers he signed.  Mike smashes the phone in frustration.

Melinda May and Fitz-Simmons investigate the building that exploded.  They quickly realize that it was actually some kind of secret lab.  Fitz-Simmons release some automated drones named after the Seven Dwarves (synergy!) to speed up their investigation.  Fitz finds a fried security camera that he believes he can recover some footage from while Simmons locates some alien tech.

Back at the interrogation, Coulson shows Skye a vial of QNB-T16.  He explains that it is a brand new and extremely potent truth drug.  Unexpectedly, Coulson injects Agent Ward with the drug and tells Skye that if she doesn’t trust them that she can clear her mind by asking Agent Ward anything she wants to.  He then leaves the room.

Look, I know this is supposed to show that Coulson does things his own way, but this seems like an incredibly bad idea.  No matter how much he is trying to get Skye to trust them, he has just left a woman who has vowed to take down S.H.I.E.L.D. with access to all the secrets she can pry out of Ward’s head.  Not to mention it is a real dick move to pull on Ward, no matter how prickly he can be.

I am going to blame it on “Tahiti”.

Back at the factory he used to work at, Mike Peterson tries to talk his former boss into giving him his job back.  When his boss refuses, Mike becomes unstable and attacks him with his superhuman strength.  Mike’s boss pleads with him that it is the company’s fault and he is “not the bad guy”.  This merely prompts Mike to declare that his boss is the “bad guy” and that he is the “hero” before attacking him with a heavy metal cylinder.

After interrogating Agent Ward, Skye seems to be warming up to Coulson.  Just in time too, since they see a TV report about Mike Peterson attacking his foreman.  She gives them Mike’s driver’s license and agrees to help them find Mike.  However, because the encryption on her hard drive is tied to the GPS in her van, she needs to move her van back to the alley in order to decrypt.

This all seems like a very clunky way to get her back to the alley where she told Mike he could find her.

Before Mike makes his way there though, he goes to visit the woman he saved in the hospital.  In a nice twist, it is revealed that this woman is the “doctor” that he was arguing with on the phone earlier.  She is angry with him for exposing her and the program.  She realizes that Mike is losing it like the first test subject who “walked into the lab with a bomb”.  Mike sees it differently though.  He is a super hero and this is his “origin story”.

Skye sends Fitz the audio file she recorded and all the information she has on Centipede.  Before she can return to the base though, Mike arrives and takes out Agent May.  He explains that he is saving her from the “black suits” so that she can save him and his son.  Shutting the van door behind him he tells her to drive.

Back at the ranch, Fitz-Simmons finally figure out what happened to the secret lab.  The Centipede device contains “every known source of super powers thrown in a blender”.  Unfortunately this includes Extremis, which anyone who watched Iron Man 3 knows can cause people explode.  So Mike is literally a ticking time bomb. 

Making matters worse is that while calming Mike down might buy them some time, he will explode in a few hours no matter what.  When asked for options, the only two Fitz-Simmons can come up with are taking him somewhere remote to explode or putting a bullet in his brain.  Coulson demands a third option.

Back in the van, Skye is deleting all records of Mike Peterson from the Internet, something she has done before (presumably her own identity).  While she is doing this she secretly sends a message with to S.H.I.E.L.D. which includes their location.  Mike then tells his son that they are going to take a train to their new lives and that they will take “the nice lady” with them to help.

Everything comes to a head at the train station, where S.H.I.E.L.D and an unknown party are both trying to get to Mike Peterson first.  Coulson has Agent Ward setup to take out Mike with a head shot if necessary, but tells him not to take it unless he has to.

Skye manages to get Mike’s son out of the line of fire, but someone dressed as a cop starts shooting up the place until Agent May takes him out.  Coulson finally gets in the same room as Mike and tries to talk him down.  Then, just as it looks as if Coulson is getting through to him, Agent Ward shoots him in the head!

Luckily it turns out that it is the non-lethal “night night” gun, which had the payload modified by Fitz-Simmons to deliver some kind of cure for the Extremis/Super Soldier/Gamma Ray cocktail in Mike’s system. Talk about your magic bullet!

The show ends with Coulson and Skye dropping Mike’s son off with some relatives who live on a farm.  Coulson recruits Skye to the team, offering her a front row seat to “the strangest show on earth”.  Skye is still considering his offer when he gets a call from Agent Ward saying that there is an “0-8-4”.  Coulson tells Skye she has ten minutes to make up her mind.  When she protests that there is no way they could get to the airfield in ten minutes, Coulson flips a switch in Lola and the red Corvette takes to the air.

Yes, S.H.I.E.L.D. flying cars have made it to the small screen.

Stray Thoughts

So, Mike is definitely going to jail, right?  I don’t mean to be a downer about the ending,  but he beat his foreman badly enough to put him in the I.C.U.

It seems like Agent Coulson has come back from the dead with a slight personality adjustment.  He seems more idealistic and less stuffy then he was in the movies.  Well, Tahiti is a magical place.

So, Coulson is a LMD, right?  Or is that too obvious?  I mean, as a comic book fan it seems obvious, but to a casual viewer having Coulson turn out to be an android would a shock, right?

Speaking of mysteries from the past, Ward has “an unusual childhood” and Skye has obviously erased all traces of her original identity.  I imagine we will get a glimpse into both of their pasts before the season is over.

I did like that at several points the episode put twists on common comic book tropes.  The fact that the a building exploding while Mike was nearby was not entirely random and the fact that the “damsel in distress” that Mike saves was actually part of the same sinister organization that gave him his powers were nice touches.

One of the shows strengths is its ties to the popular Marvel Universe, but I wonder if they will be able to take full advantage of that.  None of the characters in the pilot except Maria Hill are originally from the comics.  While some of this is the producers wanting to have free reign with their characters, I wonder if Marvel is also loathe to use established characters in the TV show for fear that they might limit their use in future movies.  For example, a TV show appearance by Power Man & Iron Fist could be a problem if Marvel later decided to make a Power Man & Iron Fist movie.

Personally I prefer the original comics “Supreme Headquarters, International Espionage, Law-Enforcement Division”, even though it is even more obviously a backronym then the modern meaning.

In Conclusion

I thought the pilot episode of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. was good but not great.  I think the show has potential though.  I only hope that it can reach that potential before its viewers abandon it.

Rating: 3 out of 5 stars.

Forgotten Realms Annual 1: Waterdhavian Nights (Chapters 5 & 6)

Chapter 5: Leaders

This chapter opens with Foxilion examining the smoking ruin that used to be the Temple of Gond.  While he is trying to figure out if there is anyway he can turn a profit on this disaster, Conner from the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons comic sneaks up behind him.

It turns out the two rogues know each other.  Conner’s sharp eyes notice a gem as large as his fist lying at the bottom of the pit.  Conner offers to split the price of the gem with Foxilion if he agrees to climb down and retrieve it.  As soon as he picks it up though, he is attacked by a headless golem.

Hmmm… I may have skipped over a key bit of exposition during my review of chapter 2.  Remember the Gondsman who looked like Lex Luthor in a stupid hat?  Well, in addition to selling the cultists smoke powder, he tried to upsell them on a golem with some very dubious properties.

Even though the golem in the picture above only vaguely resembles the one that attacks Foxilion and the control “gem” looks more like an orb than the red gemstone Foxilion stole, I think we can all agree that they are supposed to be the same, right?

Anyway, Conner helps Foxilion escape from the pit, but the golem is still in hot pursuit.  Conner tells Foxilion to make a run for Selune’s Smile.  Conner considers following, but then decides he has better things to do with his evening.

Chapter 6: Bar Tales

Captain Omen is at Selune’s Smile, which is where Agrivar told him the artifact the Eye of Selune is currently located. He plans to get his hands on it by flirting with Luna, the bar’s owner (not mention possibly getting his hands on other things).

Omen’s  plan seems to be working, as Luna eventually agrees to show Omen the eye.  Before she can though, all of the villains from earlier show up.

Ever a slave to fashion, Kyriani has taken the opportunity to change out of her dress and back into the pant suit combo she was wearing earlier.  For that matter, the cult leader has decided to put on a different helmet.  Sadly, the Yuan-Ti is no longer wearing the mailed gloves he was so proud of earlier.

The battle for the artifact begins, and Luna takes a hand crossbow bolt to the chest that was intended for Omen.  Feel free to ignore this though as Luna is totally fine on the next page.

Before the cult leader can get his hands on the Eye, Kyriani betrays him and reveals that she has been working on the side of angels all along!  Agrivar then makes his dramatic (and non-disintegrated) reappearance by jumping through a window and clocking the Yuan-Ti.

The Yuan-Ti learns that if you live by the sucker punch, you die by the sucker punch.

Before the cultists can regroup, the remaining members of the Realms’ Master crew (minus Foxilion) and the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons cast arrive.  As you can imagine, the combined group makes short work of the cultists.  When Foxilion arrives shortly afterwards being pursued by the headless golem, that threat is dispatched just as easily.

Flush with victory, the two groups of adventurers swap stories about their evening.  Luna manages to trick Captain Omen into agreeing to leave the Eye of Selune at the bar with her and gets drunk.  What a happy ending!

Well, at least until Luna tells them she expects them all to chip in and repair the damage to her bar.

Thoughts

• I have now reviewed the entire  Forgotten Realms comic series.  I have been doing these for so long I find it hard to believe that it is over. I have been thinking of starting a similar series reviewing the current IDW Dungeons & Dragons comic series though.  If anyone is interested in seeing that, let me know in the comments.
• I found the art shifts between the chapters to be distracting.  Considering how common this practice is in the comic book industry for annuals and other oversized books, I am not sure why it bugged me so much in this one.
• I must admit that Captain Omen is quite the ladies man.  I wonder if he still would have flirted with Luna if he realized she was an aspect of the goddess Selune.

Forgotten Realms Annual 1: Waterdhavian Nights (Chapters 3 & 4)

Chapter 3: Soul Mates

Onyx, the dwarf from the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons comic, is attempting to lose the golem he spotted following him in the city streets.  Unfortunately, he doesn’t realize he is being followed by evil cultists as well.  Onyx runs right into the Yuan-Ti from earlier, who cold cocks him with a chainmail glove.

Oddly, the Yuan-Ti is extremely proud of himself for this maneuver.  Standing over Onyx’s body, the Yuan-Ti taunts him, talking about how the dwarf never expected a “snake-man” to have a mailed fist.  It is a surprisingly long monologue about his ability to punch someone, but I guess as a “snake-man” he is just glad to have arms or something.

He is still going on when Minder shows up and cleans his clock.  Minder dotes over Onyx’s unconscious body when Kyriani shows up with a barrel of poison under her arm.  Apparently, Kyriani also took the opportunity to change outfits as she is wearing a dress with thigh-high boots instead of the pant suit number she was wearing in chapter one.

Kyriani and the Yuan-Ti decide discretion is the better part of valor and escape while Minder is occupied.  While they are running away, I can only assume that the Yuan-Ti tells Kyriani about how awesome it was that he punched the dwarf with his mailed fist.

Back in the alley, Onyx wakes up and is startled to have a golem hovering over him.  Minder convinces him that she means him no harm, then asks Onyx if dwarves fall in love.

Somehow Onyx is able to tell Minder is a female dwarf by looking in her eyes, but he isn’t bright enough to realize that she is not wearing some golem shaped suit of armor.  She recaps her origin story for him, which takes just long enough for the remaining cultists to wake up.

The cultists have a glass ball filled with grey ooze which they throw at Minder.  It seems a bit odd that they would carry this around, but it provides Onyx a chance to shine as he takes out the cultists and saves Minder from the metal eating ooze.  The pair witness the explosion of the Temple of Gond from chapter two which they take as a sign that they should be a couple (I don’t get it either).  Onyx asks Minder to come with him to the bar Selune’s Smile so he can show her off to his friends.

Chapter 4: The Trouble With Humans

So Vartan has apparently decided to visit a brothel. 

Well, the caption calls it “one of Waterdeep’s more affordable ‘festhalls’”.  Note the word affordable and the quotation marks around the word festhalls.  Those are both from the original narration box.

Unfortunately, Vartan runs afoul with a mountain of a man named Troggoth who claims to be the women’s husband. I personally take this to mean he has paid them upfront for the full night.  In any case, Troggoth decides Vartan will pay for his impudence with a severe beat down.

Vartan decides to flee and jumps through the window unto a horse.  Well he thinks it is a horse, but actually it is Timoth, the centaur from the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons comic book.  Timoth politely asks Vartan to dismount, when Troggoth breaks through the stone wall?!?

Seeing the incredible Hulk’s uglier brother bearing down on them, Timoth takes off at a full gallop with Vartan still on his back.  Once they are safely away, Vartan and Timoth belatedly introduce themselves to one another.  Timoth suggests going back to Selune’s Smile, but before they get there they spy a burglary in progress.

The burglary is of a mind flayer “statue” which Timoth knows is an actual mind flayer who was turned to stone.  Timoth realizes that the cultists are probably looking to bring the mind flayer back to life and decides to put a stop to it (with Vartan along for the ride).

There is a  perfunctory battle with the cultists, which features both a runaway horse cart and Vartan’s somewhat racist belief that centaurs can speak with horses.  During the battle, the mind flayer’s stone body falls from the cart and is shattered.  Vartan is also thrown from the cart, but somehow manages to avoid being crushed by either the cart or the statue.

Hearing the commotion, Onyx and Minder rush in from one direction, while Ishi and Vajra rush in from the other.  This brings most, but certainly not all, of our heroes together.

Well at least you can’t accuse Vartan of taking credit he doesn’t deserve.  I disagree that it would have been easier for him to take his pummeling though—Troggoth was capable of smashing though stone walls after all!

Thoughts

• I was not a huge fan of the Dwarven soul mate idea.  The fact that Onyx can tell Minder is a female dwarf by looking into her eyes just seems hokey to me.
• Note that despite being “soul mates”, neither Minder or Onyx ever mention each other again after this issue is over.
• It is interesting to see the arrogant, skirt-chasing Vartan again after just reading issues featuring the somber and contemplative Vartan.  He definitely changed more than any of the other characters during the course of the series.

Forgotten Realms Annual 1: Waterdhavian Nights (Chapters 1 & 2)

The first and only Forgotten Realms annual was set before the events of the Time of Troubles.  It was a simpler time for Captain Omen and the Realms’ Master crew.  Captain Omen explains that Agrivar has informed him that the artifact called the Eye of Selune is being kept at a bar called Selune’s Smile.   Omen has decided that it is his duty to “collect” this artifact for the owners own good.

Captain Omen is concerned though because the crew’s recent adventures in Baldur’s Gate and Saelroon have left them less than welcome in those cities.  He asks everyone to be on their best behavior while they are in port.

Unfortunately, they arrive during what appears to be the Waterdeep equivalent of Mardi Gras.

Agrivar sees his half-sister in the crowd and takes off after her.  The rest of the crew uses this as an excuse to scatter and see the sights.  Even Minder, who Omen expects will stick by his side, leaves when she sees a handsome young dwarf.

The comic then splits into chapters, each following a member of the Realms’ Master crew.

Chapter 1: Siblings

Agrivar follows his half-sister Kyriani through the crowded streets.  He sees her come to a door guarded by two ogres, who she gets past by providing a password.  Agrivar is concerned because she looks different than the last time he saw her and she has had problems with her “dark side” before.

Perhaps I should take a moment to explain a few things about Priam Agrivar’s half-sister.  In the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons comic book, Kyriani was the daughter of Ostus Agrivar and a drow sorceress.  When she was born her father called her Cybriana and she was left to be raised by elves.  While under the elves care, they noticed a growing evil in her and cast a spell that split her into two beings: Cybriana (who appeared as a blonde elf) and Kilil (who appeared as a drow). 

During the first story arc of the comic the two beings were merged back into a frizzy-haired brunette elf.  This is how she looked when Agrivar last saw her. 

Sometime after that, Kyriani was split apart again.  This time she was reintegrated into a sexpot with raven black hair that had a silver streak in it.  You may remember her from when Omen was hitting on her in issue 24.

So Agrivar is definitely right when he says she “looks different”.  Frankly, I am stunned he was able to recognize her from across a crowded street in Waterdeep.

Back to the story.  When Agrivar peeks in the window to see what his sister is up to, he sees an almost comically diverse gathering of evil creatures.

Kyriani appears to be collaborating with these cultists to help them locate the Eye of Selune.  About this time Agrivar is discovered spying by the ogres.  The drow elf believes this is a sign of Kyriani’s treachery, but she decides to prove her loyalty by disintegrating her half-brother.

Well, I guess that is what he gets for ignoring Captain Omen’s request to be on his best behavior.

Chapter 2: Fireworks

The story now moves on to Ishi, who is shopping in the Waterdeep marketplace. A mischievous street urchin decides to play a prank on Ishi using fireworks.

Ishi is pretty pissed, but before she can act the street urchin is caught by Vajra from the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons comic.

Realizing the street urchin is no threat, she lets him go after confiscating the rest of his fireworks.  Ishi and Vajra introduce themselves, and the two warrior women take an instant liking to one another.

While they are talking, Vajra becomes distracted because she sees the cultists from chapter one walk by with a Gondsman dressed like Lex Luthor wearing a stupid hat.  Ishi offers to help her new friend find out what they are up to.

The pair follow them to a Temple of Gond where the cultists are negotiating for smoke powder (i.e., the Forgotten Realms equivalent of gunpowder).  The Gondsman is offering them enough smoke powder to blow up a small building, and it is implied that they plan to use it to blow up Selune’s Smile (the bar that the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons comic is based out of).

Obviously, there is no way that Vajra and Ishi are going to let this happen, so they bust in to break up the deal before it can be completed.  The two swordswomen make short work of the majority of the cultists, but the cult leader and escapes by summoning Chasme to fly him away (Chasme are the weird bug people who were with the cultists in chapter one).

Deciding not to leave anything to chance, Ishi uses the fireworks she confiscated from the street urchin to blow up the smoke powder reserves, taking out the entire Temple of Gond in the process!

To be continued…

Thoughts

• This annual is the only team up between the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons and the Forgotten Realms comic.  Pairing off members of the two teams does a good job of introducing the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons characters to readers who might not be familiar to them.
• In the initial meeting with the cultists, it is somewhat awkwardly established that the drow woman cannot understand the language of the surface elves.  This obviously so she can’t tell what spell Kyriani is casting when she “disintegrates” Agrivar.  Luckily for Kyriani this is before the days of third edition where she could make a Spellcraft roll to figure out what is really going on.
• Since Gondsmen are the “mad scientists” of the Forgotten Realms, I have a feeling that making the Gondsman leader look like Lex Luthor is not a coincidence.